Tuesday, 17 February 2015

Shifu Kulimila’s Crude Comedy: A Response to the Sajjadan 'Defence'

Question:
What does the word “Tilaawa,” and the phrases “Bismil Laahi Rahmaani Raheem and Swadaqal Laahul Azweem,” have in common? Hopefully we will arrive at an answer at the end of this article. A rebuttal to defense of shifu’s comedy.

But before I proceed, I’d advice anyone who wishes to defend kulimila to get a playback of his presentation at the Islamic Ummah of Ghana (IUG) program held at Efua Sutherland’s Park few weeks back.

Well, one Brother Sajjad Iddriss Toppoh has come to the defense of shifu kulimila’s comedy with two main points. One: that shifu doesn’t distort the Quran as some of us claim and that he employs a reading format similar to Quranic recitation.

Two: that the recitation we use today is not how the prophet used to recite it so we cannot lay claim to that tonation and use it as a basis to crucify the comedian in question. There is the bit about Ugandan Christians reading the bible like we read the Quran also.

The problem of Sajjad is that he has not paused to ask why kulimila did not use the CNN or TV3 news format or the Supersport or BBC commentary style to joke but rather a QURAN module as he Sajjad has accepted is the case?

The problem is the format the comedian employed, he was simply not right. Maybe he should try using a political rally or lecture hall format to joke and we will not even blink but insofar as he decides to use the Quranic format he is making mockery and to borrow Sajjad’s word, that is unacceptable “quackery.”

Go to Saudi, dress like the Crown Prince and talk like him in ridiculous terms and tell me you will walk off in one piece, try it in the case of Hassan Rouhani or Imam Khomeini in Iran. Freedom of speech we agree; but be ready for liability for your stupidity which comes from your so called ‘freedom.’ That much you must be told.


TILAAWA AND OTHER MATTERS
No Arab anywhere in the world will start any lecture or speech by saying he is going to do ‘Tilaawa.’ Why; tilaawa is the recitation of passages of the Quran. That is what kulimila said he was going to do before he began doing his ‘rough’.

Who forced him to say that?

He started by saying Bismil Laahi Rahmaani Raheem (In the name of Allah; Most Gracious, Most Merciful). As far as we know, that terminology became known in Arabic literature when the Quran was revealed. It is a Quranic verse repeated as many times as the number of chapters. 114 times

Again; was a gun put to kulimila’s head or a sharp knife to his throat to start by reciting the ‘basmalah?’

After messing himself up and ridiculing himself; knowledgeable as he was, he knew that there was the need to give a befitting closure to his nonsense as would any Imam/Aalim worth his salt after reciting the Quran.

His choice of conclusion was apt but very unfortunately and nauseatingly applied, “Swadaqal laahul Azweem,” and then again we ask, who begged him to commit that blunder?

The Ugandan Christian bit is funny as is dismissive not to talk of how Rasul recited the Quran back in the days; where is the audio record of how Rasul read the Quran? Sajjad I am certain can help us insha Allah.

And oh, the bit about scholarly opinion on the matter (Sajjad sadly forgot to share in his edict), venture into those waters and kulimila is out of business in a wink. Tell a pack of lies to get people cracking, you are the source of ridicule of a group of people?

Come to think of it; what new can kulimila bring to the comedy table? Most jokes he tells are hausa version of already known jokes, period! That is in no way to take away his stage craft and ability to deliver.

At least thanks to Sajjad, this is our second piece directed to him. We would accept him to joke but to insult himself in the process, we won’t accept it.

I maintain that some of shifu kulmila’s comedy are worse than charlie hebdo cartoons.

Starting tilaawa with basmala and ending with swadaqal Laahul Azweem is certainly no joke. Not in Uganda much less in Ghana or Iran.

May Allah guide us to truth, help us to stand by it and to apply it to the best of our capability. Wal Laahu a’lam wa ahkam.
Thanks for reading my thoughts.

Abdur Rahman Alfa Shaban
newcguide@gmail.com

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